the organization of divinity.

 it is almost like entering your mind.

i've always been very scared of entering my mind. 

the mind is vast. 

complex and tiring, i believed.

but all it was, was quiet.

a quietness that is almost deafening. 

not a breath. not a stir.

a quiet that could make you rip your skin off.

somehow 

that was the quiet that felt like homecoming.

i've always been a quiet girl.

my silence is at my innermost.

void of the impurity of emotion and requirement.

here,

all one has to do is be still.

there is such simplicity to the mind.

yet people select convolution over silence.

-

i know how my mind looks.

my mind too, is spherical and incomprehensible, bordered by trees and shrubbery and a large banyan tree.

all in spirals and circles. like how the universe appears. 

my outermost is a plated bowl that drains water consistently. 

digestible and attractive. 

all the eyes follow the stream of water that journeys the basin before disappearing right at the bottom.

all the heads nod in unison, whether in appreciation or assumption i am not sure.

a few sit and watch the water drain 

but nobody stays quiet as they were told to.

the passages lead to the dome.

almost nobody has the patience to discover nothingness.

there it leads to the padded. 

flesh, soft and familiar to resemble the womb.

and the staircase that spirals to the top.

all the hands reach for a seat. but there are none here.

the staircase takes great patience to overcome. 

and the whispers get louder.

at my innermost i am vacuum.

here is a room with only a pillow on the floor.

and the only condition is silence.

not many can sit in the chamber for long.

not many have the patience.

i am not disappointed. it is expected.

i enter the room and sit for a while.

there is a globe at the centre.

and a ray of light pours in from above it.

so many sit around the globe.

if you break this silence, you are condemned from the chamber.

it is here that my mind recognizes itself, and quietens down.

it is here that i can hear silence.

here there is no anger

contempt

invalidity

i do not care for people who find discomfort in such silence.

here the irrelevance of sound vibrates in the air.

i am the most comfortable in the absence of affirmation and loud looking.

all those that cannot contain themselves are sent out. i smile. i sit for a long while in a quiet that is just mine.

it reminds me of being a little girl during the drive home.

quiet.

static.

conscious.

comfortable.

[the matrimandir]